Nothing To Be Proud Of
by Autobot Chromia
Summary: We all know of Prowl and how Sensei Yokitron helped him,but what did he help him with? Why was he so dissrespectful to him at first? Optimus Prime,Ratchet,and Bumblebee learn about Prowl's past. His real past. Rated T for safety. I own nothing except the plot.
1. Chapter 1 The Box

Chapter 1 The Box

"Don't you ever call this line again."Prowl said over his comm. link.

He was speaking to none other but the bounty hunter Lockdown. After going with him,getting a few Starscream clones,being overwhelmed with upgrades,and destroying what he loved, Prowl was done. The tree he had crashed through had contained a birds nest. A nest with eggs in it. Eggs that contained potential life. Life was something that he had sworn to protect. That's what being an Autobot meant. Protecting the weak and innocent, sometimes even the strong and the guilty,but life. All life.

Now Prowl was done. He was done with the upgrades,the disrespect for his leader. He was falling back into old habits. Terrible habits. Habits that were formed in a time when he did things he shouldn't have. Things he wasn't proud of. Things that nobody would be proud of. He was glad to be back at base. To be heading to his berthroom. To meditate and clear his processor. He was heading towards his berthroom when a voice stopped him.

"Prowl,what is this?"Optimus Prime asked,holding out a small box."It's addressed to you."

"I didn't order anything. And I know of nobody who would send me anything."Prowl answered.

"It's not that kind of addressed."Optimus said."It simply has your designation on it."

Prowl took the small box. It couldn't hold more than a few items,and rather small items at that. His name was scrawled across the top of the taped box. It was rather messy handwriting.

"The penbotship isn't familiar."Prowl said.

Optimus shrugged his shoulder strut."Take it to your berthroom and open it."

"All right."Prowl said,turning to leave.

"Hey,Prowl! Watcha got there?"a young voice asked excitedly.

"Nothing that concerns you."Prowl replied to Bumblebee."It's rather late,shouldn't you be in your berth?"

"You're not my sire."Bumblebee said defiantly."What's in the box?"

"I may not be your sire,but I am your elder."Prowl said."And I don't know myself."

"Bumblebee,get in your berth this instant!"a gruff voice called out.

"All right,Ratchet."Bumblebee said,jumping up."Night!"

And like that the yellow bot ran up the hall and into his room. Bulkhead was already in his room, most likely in stasis.

Prowl followed the way Bumblebee had gone,and went into his own berthroom. He turned on a light,which illuminated a part of the room and reflected off of the leaves of a tree which had grown there. The sight of it reminded Prowl of the tree he had partially destroyed,and the lives of three baby birds,still unhatched, he had killed. He sighed as he set the box down on the desk. He slowly popped open one of the taped sides and stepped back in shock and horror.

"No. It can't be."Prowl gasped,staggering back.

He tripped over the chair,knocking it over and hitting the desk with his helm. The box fell off of the desk and onto it's side. Out of it,rolled needles and a few dark bottles.

"Prowl,are you all right?"Optimus called through the halls.

"Just fine."Prowl said,trying to stand up.

He rubbed the back of his helm as he quickly picked up the chair and threw the items back in the box. Everything seemed to want to clatter and bang in his haste,resulting in a great ruckus,which drew Optimus and Ratchet towards his door.

"Are you sure everything's all right?"Ratchet asked.

"Just fine."Prowl repeated.

He set the box on the desk and went to the door and opened it.

"What is going on in there?"Optimus asked.

"Nothing."Prowl said.

"Nothing?"Ratchet asked."The side of your helm's all dented in."

Prowl reached up and touched the tender part,and was surprised to feel a large divit.

"I was,uh...practicing positions and,er...tripped."Prowl said with a slight chuckle."Hit my helm on the desk."

"Come with me."Ratchet said."I want to knock that out and go get some recharge."

"That's quite all right,Ratcher."Prowl said quickly,stepping back into the room.

"That wasn't a suggestion."Ratchet said.

"Prowl,what is going on?"Optimus asked."Have you opened that package yet?"

"Package? What package?"Prowl asked quickly.

"The package I gave you five cycles ago."Optimus said.

"I think that dent gave you some damage."Ratchet said,taking Prowl's servo."I'm tired and want to get some recharge. Let's go."

Prowl quickly shook Ratchet off and jumped back into his room.

"Then you should get some rest. Good night."Prowl said as he quickly closed the door to his room.

"Prowl?"Optimus called out,confused."Open up."

There was no answer,and the door did not budge.

Ratchet shook his helm."I'm going to bed."

"All right."Optimus too left for his berth.

Prowl was on the other side of the door,his back struts resting on it's cold, metal frame. He vented,upset at how he had treated his Prime and medic. But they couldn't find out. They couldn't.


	2. Chapter 2 The Contents

Chapter 2 The Contents

Prowl took the box back off of the desk and sat cross-peded on the floor. He opened it up again and slowly took out it's content,one by one,and laid them beside him.

There were filled needles of polychromine or 'Pit juice',as it was called by some addicted to it. There were dark bottles or oil beer,and a few of high grade energon. High grade energon! One of the most rare and potent alcahol there is to a bot.

"No."Prowl whispered to himself."Why? How?" he asked in desparation."I've been clean for stellar cycles."

Prowl looked deeply at the vial of polychromine in his hands. He vented as he looked at the bottled of alcahol surrounding him. He closed his optics,remembering the old days. They days when the war had just started,or hadn't even started yet. Before Sensei Yokitron and before being a ninja.

_A young black and gold figure slunk through the alley ways of Iacon. He was in the ghetto part of it,and whished to return to the main city. _

_He was very young, a youngling of only about seven or eight to a human. He had always been alone. Always been in the streets,searching for something to energize with,someplace to sleep,someplace to stay warm. He very rarely every found any of those things. A robo-dog howled somewhere in the distance,and he ducked behind a garbage can._

_"Come on,Prowl."he said to himself shakily."It's just a dog. The chances of it being rabid are slim to none."_

_His tank grinded loudly,begging for something to be put in it. He rubbed it,trying to ease the hunger pains. A cold wind made him shiver and curl up,and the robo-dog howled again,much closer. He saw it's shadow slowly sneaking up on him. He shook in fear and cold as it smelled the air,and turned to face the can he was well hidden behind. He took an intake and held it,hoping that it would turn and leave. It didn't,and kicked the can away,growling at him. Prowl saw the foam dripping from it's mouth. It was rabid._

_"N-nice doggie."Prowl said,slowly standing up and backing away._

_The dog lunged at him,and he dodged. It smashed into the side of a building,and Prowl ran as fast as he could. He ran up and down deserted alley ways and empty streets._

_"Help! Help! Somebody,please!"he shouted as he ran down another alley. A_

_fter a few turns,he found himself not only hopelessly lost,but at a dead end. The dog had managed to follow him,and now he was cornered. He sat down as tears fell down his face plates,accepting his fate. _

_"Help!"he sobbed,but it was a vain attempt. _

_The robo-dog was slowly sneaking up on was croutched low to the ground,ready to pounce. Prowl wiped away another tear and looked the dog dead in the optic. It lunged and he dodged,but not fast enough. It grabbed his servo and began to brutally tear at it. He screamed as he felt the warm oil flow down his servo onto the ground,pooling around him. He closed his optics as it bit him again,this time in the pede._

_"Stop!"he screamed and cried._

_Suddenly,a shot rang out and the robo-dog fell over. It bleed itself,but it was offlined. Prowl shakily stood up as a tall mech walked foward and scanned the dead cyber-animal._

_"You got lucky."he said in a deep,husky tone."It's not rabid."_

_"T-thank you,sir."Prowl said shakily as he stood up._

_The stranger didn't seem to notice that Prowl was injured,badly. It was night and very dark._

_"You're lucky that I came before it got ya',kid."the stranger continued._

_Prowl didn't hear him as everything became distorted. The youngling collapsed to the ground,oil continuing to pool around him. The last image he saw before total blackness,was the figure hovering over him._

_"Kid,are you all right?"_


	3. Chapter 3 Dreaming of the Past

Chapter 3 Dreaming of the Past

Prowl snapped his optics back open. Why was he thinking of that? Well,he knew why,but that didn't change anything. He vented as he but the contents of the box in a drawer in the desk,and locked it.

"Nobody must ever find these."he said quietly to himself.

He went over to the wall on the opposite side of the room. There was a latch there,and he pulled on it. The wall began to go towards the floor,revaeling a folding berth. He like the way the berth would fold into the wall when he was done with it,simply by folding it back up. He lay down on his side,and closed his optics. He soon was in recharge.

_"Hey,Cross."a semi-gruff voice said."He's wakin' up."_

_A soft moan came from the small black and gold mech laying on one of three berths. He unshuttered his optics,and looked up into the face of two mechs._

_"How ya' feelin',kid?"a red and gray mech asked._

_"F-fine,thanks."the black youngling said nervously._

_"What's yer name?"the fisr mech asked,who was black with blue highlights._

_"Um...I'm Prowl."he said,sitting flinched as he moved one of his servos and pedes._

_"Prowl,huh?"the red mech said."I'm Doublecross,and the one that saved ya' is Blackmail."_

_"T-thank you."Prowl said,turning to the black mech called Blackmail._

_"What were ya' doin' out there all alone?"Doublecross asked._

_"I-I've always been alone."Prowl answered,hanging his helm."I was just trying to find someplace to sleep."_

_"Poor kid."a female voice said._

_A green and dark blue femme turned from the stove. The place only seemed to be one large room. There were three berths,a table with three chairs,a stove,a fridge,a few cupboards and shelves,and a small holo-vid player. Everything was shoved into this one,dirty room,and there didn't seem to be any other rooms._

_The femme made her way to the berth Prowl sat on."I'm Vortex."she said._

_"Hello, ma'am."Prowl said._

_"You look hungry,kid."Blackmail said,taking a can from one of the cupboards."Here,take this."_

_With that,he opened up the can like it was a can of soda pop. He handed it to Prowl,who thanked him._

_"Cross,he's just a kid."Vortex said,almost pleading._

_"If we're gonna keep him as a costomer,he has to start now."Doublecross hissed under his breath._

_Prowl had taken a sip from the can,and had began to choke and cough at it's rancid flavor. It tasted spoiled. The mechs laughed as Vortex retreated to a corner of the room,watching with sad optics._

_"Drink it,kid."Doublecross said."It's godd for ya'."_

_Prowl nodded,not wanting tro appear rude. He swallowed hard before taking another sip. He choked it down, and started to cough hard once it was finished. The mechs laughed again as Prowl lept up. Vortex rushed him over to a trash can in the corner of the room._

_"Look at that,Cross."Blackmail laughed."Mech can't even hold his liquor!"_

_"He's only a youngling!"Vortex spat at them. She turned back to Prowl."Are you finished?"_

_Prowl had purged the vile drink,which turned out to have been a can of oil beer. He had brown flecks around his mouth,and was trembling slightly._

_"I-I apologize."he said,hanging his small,black helm._

_"Don't you worry."Vortex said,taking a dirty rag from a drawer and wiping his face off._

_There were tears in his optics,but he refused to let them fall. He took a shakey breath._

_"T-thank you for your help."he said shyly."I-Is there any way I can repay you?"_

_"Give me your servo."Blackmail said,holding a needle in his hand._

_"No!"Vortex shouted,placing herself between the mech and youngling."You will not do that."_

_"Outta my way,Pylon."Blackmail hissed,pushing her aside._

_She tried to regain her position,but Doublecross had grapped her servo and gripped her wrist tightly. She flinched as she felt the sharp fingers dig into her metal._

_"I said gimme yer servo,kid."Blackmail said again._

_Prowl quickly nodded and held it out,scared if he didn't,scared if he did. The needle slid between a slit in his metal and into a tube. It hurt,like getting a shot. He gritted his denta as the contents of it were injeceted into him._

_"Wha-what is that?"Prowl gasped._

_"Nothing that you need to know about."Doublecross said,letting go of Vortex._

_"Now,if you start feeling strange,"Blackmail said,disposing of the needle,"Just come right back here."_

_"Y-yes,sir."Prowl said."T-thank you for your help."_

_Vortex hid her face as energon tears quickly composed herself."I'll walk you down."_

_"Ya' will not."another voice said._

_"Hey,Lockdown!"Doublecross said."Havn't seen ya' around here for awhile."_

_"I know."Lockdown said,stepping in. _

_He was pretty scary to look at,especially to a youngling. He was very tall,and a green in color,with what seemed to be black stripes. He had a hook for one hand,and a chainsaw for another._

_"I see you got yourselves another costomer."Lockdown said,inspecting Prowl."Kinda young."_

_"Start 'em off young and they'll be with ya' till their old."Blackmail said._

_Lockdown nodded."I got yer shipment."_

_"That's great."Vortex said sarcasticaly._

_"Still no respect for yer brothers' business?"Lockdown asked with a laugh._

_"And never will."Vortex huffed._

_Lockdown laughed again."I'll take the kid better have some nice upgrades or a whole lotta creds fer me when I get back. This stuff ain't easy to come by."_

_The hook replacing Lockdown's hand was offered to Prowl,who took it just to avoid an argument. Lockdown walked him down the hall and down a dirty,dark flight of stairs. Soon they were outside,on a dirty street. Lockdown looked down at Prowl and spoke._

_"Listen,kid."he said."These bots are no good."_

_"Y-yes,sir."Prowl answered,somewhat frightened._

_"They gave you an injection,right?"Lockdown asked,Prowl nodded._

_An evil,greedy smile flicked across Lockdown's face for a second,before dissapearing._

_"Take this."Lockdown said,handing a small device to Prowl. _

_It looked like a small data pad,but it had a map of Iacon on it,and a small red dot pulsating._

_"That's mah ship."Lockdown said quickly,as if he were trying to help."That injection's gunna make ya' feel funny. Come and see me when it does,got it?"_

_Prowl nodded again."Y-yes,sir. Thank you."_

_"No need ta thank me, kid."Lockdown said._

"No,there wasn't."Prowl said as he woke up.

Why was he thinking of all this all of a sudden? All these memories he had tried to surpress now coming to the surface. He sighed as he sat up on his berth. He streached slightly and rubbed the back of his helm. He flinched as he touched the dent.

"Fool."he said to himself.

He put his berth back into the wall,and left. It was early,and he was the only one up,or so he thought. This is how it was every morning. He would meditate and practice some positions,and then and Optimus would wake up. Ratchet would follow fifteen cycles later.

He sighed again is he crossed his pedes on the floor. He folded his hands,index digits pointed,and began his meditations. He couldn't focus though. His processor kept filling with images from his younglinghood,and at last he gave up. He stood up and began to do poses and positions. He was doing a very simple pose that required complete attention. He was standing on one pede,his optics closed,and his hands in meditation pose.

"Prowl."

Prowl jumped foward,away from the hand that tappe his shoulder and the voice that called him. He spun around,falling on his back struts and landing with a grunt and bang.

"What is it,Ratchet?"Prowl asked in an irritated voice."What are you doing up?"

"What were you draming about?"Ratchet asked,ignoring Prowl.

"Whatever do you mean?"

"Last night."Ratchet continued."You were shouting in your recharge."

Prowl stood up,rubbing the dent he had his again."I apologize if I disturbed you last night."

Ratchet grabbed Prowl's servo and sat him on the couch.

"Ratch,what are you doing?"Prowl asked,irritated at the medic's lack of communication.

"Checking out your helm."Ratchet said,scanning him.

"I am fine."Prowl grumbled,trying to stand up.

"For now."Ratchet said."Take out your weapons."

Prowl looked at the medic oddly,but proceeded to open up the section he stored his shruiken. To his shock,it was stuck. He pretended that it wasn't.

"Right now?"Prowl asked.

"Right now."Ratchet said."Or you can transform."

"Fine."Prowl said,standing up.

He was planning on taking off the second his two wheels hit the ground,but he never got the chance. As he started to contract his servos and bedes,nothing but a weak,sick whirring sounded and he stayed standing. Ratchet looked at him smugly,knowing that he couldn't take iut his weapons or transform.

"I'm waiting,Prowl."Ratchet smirked.

"All right."Prowl sighed."I can't."

"Because of that dent."Ratchet said."It's messin' with ya'."

"What do you plan on doing then?"Prowl asked,defeated.

"Knock it out."Ratchet said.

He took Prowl towards his med-bay as the others came into the main hangar.

"What's going on?"Bumblebee asked,as Prowl ducked into the med-bay.

"I'm fixing this fool."Ratchet said,closing the door behind him.

"What happened to Prowl?"Bulkhead asked,turning to Optimus.

"Prowl hit his helm on his desk last night and refused help from Ratchet."Optimus said.

"Oh."Bumblebee said."I'm going to pick up Sari."

"All right."Optimus answered,going to the moniters.

Bulkhead went and turned on the news. He didn't like it much,but the local news channels had helped them in the past.

"All right,Prowl."Ratchet said,laying the ninja-bot out on the berth."I'm going to knoeck you out and then knock out that dent."

"Yes,Ratchet."Prowl said.

Ratchet came over and soon had Prowl in an induced stasis.

"Now to get to work."

_The black and gold youngling was trembling as he made his way to Lockdown's ship. That odd mech had been right,he was feeling funny. He felt sick and shakey and anxious. He was having a hard time with his intakes,and wanted to cry, scream, and laugh insanely all at the same time._

_Lockdown seemed to be waiting for him. He was leaning on the side of his ship,watching him come foward._

_"What brings ya here,kid?"Lockdown asked._

_Prowl gasped a few times,trying to form words but only making staticy gabbering sounds. His optics widened in fear._

_"Take it easy,kid."Lockdown jabbed him with another needle._

_As the contents of this needle entered his tubes,Prowl became relieved. His intakes became even,and he was feeling less panicky._

_"Thanks."Prowl said."W-what happened?"_

_"Withdrawal."Lockout said._

_"W-what?"Prowl exclaimed._

_Lockdown chuckled."Yep. This 'er is polychromine."_

_"But thats a-"_

_"Drug."Lockdown finished."Congratulations. You are officaly addicted."_

_"No!"Prowl exclaimed._

_"Yep. Ya stop now,ya'll offline."Lockdown said._

_"I-I will?"Prowl asked._

_"Yep."Lockdown said."And if you want more,it's gonna cost ya' from now on."_

_"B-but I don't have any credits."Prowl said,his voice waivering and hitching as tears stung his optics._

_"Not mah problem."Lockdown said._

_He turned and went into his ship,leaving Prowl alone._

_"No,I can't be."he cried to himself._

"All right,time to wake ya' up."Ratchet said,having finished his work.

He inturrupted stasis and the instant he did so, Prowl began to mutter in his half awake sense.

"No...poly...No."Prowl said,shaking his black helm back and forth as if plagued with nightmares.

"Prowl."Ratchet said,becoming worried."Wake up."he started to shake the black mech.

"No,no..."Prowl continued to shouted and shot up like a bullet,right off of the bertj and ready to strike."No!"

"Prowl,calm down."Ratchet said quickly.

"Ratchet?"Prowl asked. He glanced about him. He straightened up."I-I'm.."

"What's going on?"Optimus asked,coming in.

He saw Prowl standing up,looking frightened and surprised. Ratchet looked surprised too,as well as confused. Optimus was just confused.

"What is going on?"Optimus repeated.

"Nothing."Ratchet said."Prowl got a little spooked coming out of stasis."

"I was not spooked."Prowl said defiantly.

Optimus sighed and shook his helm. He decided to change the subject.

"Did you ever open that box?"he asked.

"Yes."Prowl said,his voice saying very much so that he wished to leave.

"And what was in it?"Optimus continued.

"Nothing."Prowl said.

"It was empty?"

"No."Prowl said.

"So there was something in it."Optimus said,trying to make sence of what the cyber-ninja was saying.

"Yes."Prowl said,sticking to his short,one worded answers.

"Then what was in it?"Ratchet asked this time.

"Nothing."Prowl repeated,before adding."Which concerns either of you."

With that,Prowl left.

"What is going on with him?"Optimus asked as the med-bay door closed.

Ratchet shook his helm."I think he's hiding something."

"Like what?"Optimus asked.

"Don't know."Ratchet said."Could be about his past,what was in that box,anything."

Optimus sighed. He was going to leave to check the moniters."Do you need anything?"

"Just to figure out what;s going on with Prowl."Ratchet said.

Optimus nodded and entered the main hangar. Bumblebe ehad returned with Sari,and the two had teamed up with Bulkhead and were in the middle of some game.

"Where's Prowl?"Optimus asked.

"He stormed out of here."Bumblebee said as if it were no big deal."He transformed and left."

Optimus sighed and went to the moniter. He saw Prowl's energy signal,and decided not to worry about it. Prowl just needed some time,most likely. He'd come around. Hopefully.


	4. Chapter 4 Just a Sip

Chapter 4 Just a Sip

Prowl speed up the streets of Detroit. He was heading for a nearby forset. Nature would help him clear his processor. As he drove,he asked himself question after question.

"Why don't I just get rid of the box?"Prowl asked himself.

'Because you want it.' a little voice told him.

"But why? All they bring me is pain."Prowl fought himself.

'Because you want it.'the voice repeated.

"Want what?"Prowl almost shouted.

'You want to do it again.'it said.

Prowl would have slid to a stop if he hadn't been in traffic. Did he really wish to continue his old ways? The alcahol had been comforting when he was hurting as a youngling. It made him forget all of the pain and the hurt. The polychromine also added to that. Who cared about the damage it caused? It helped.

"No."Prowl said loudly."I-I can't."

"You can't what?"an accented voice asked from slightly above and behind him.

He had reached the woods awhile ago,but hadn't transfromed,instead, continued to drive slowly.

"Blitzwing."Prowl said,transforming and turning around.

"Correct."Blitzwing said. His head swirrled around,and his dangerous personality and face showed."I will now crush you,puny Autobot."

:Prowl: a voice called over his comm. link. :It's Prime,I;m picking up two signals with you:

"Two?"Prowl said.

Suddenly,Lugnut appeared in the sky,and landed with a thud behind Blitzwing.

"Yep."Blitzing said,his black and red face showing his crazy side."One Decepticon plus one Decepticon equalls no Autobot!"he then laughed,shooting at Prowl with an icy blast.

Prowl flipped and ducked,avoiding it easily,and the blast froze a bush.

"Stand still so that I can destroy you!"Blitzing demanded in a deep,angry voice.

Lugnut was not remaining idle either. He had been shooting at Prowl as well. Prowl grabbed some shruiken,and threw them at both 'Cons. He watched in horror as one of the shruiken was on a direct path for the red button on Lugnut's 'hands'.

"Look out!"Prowl said,knowing that if the shriken hit them,there would be an explosion.

But it was too late. The shriken hit the button,and the next thing Prowl knew was that he was no longer on the ground. He was surrounded by blinding heat,about thirty feet off of the ground. There was a small,rocky cliff about fifty feet from where they had been fighting, and Prowl soon felt it become one with his frame. He heard the bash and the shattering,crunching sound of his metal. He felt the warm oil flow,and the fire from the explosion began to ebb away. When he opened his optics again,for he had closed them as he hit the cliff,he found himself at the base of it.

"The Autobot has destroyed himself!"Blitzwing said in his angry voice,switching to crazy."Who woulda guessed,huh huh huh?"

"N-not...destroyed."Prowl managed,struggling to his pede.

His right one was missing. No,there it was,over by that tree. He couldn't move his left hand either,and it hurt to move his right servo.

"No,not destroyed."Lugnut said."Defeated! Defeated for the glory of Lord Megatron!"

Prowl didn't say anything. He could feel melted parts of his frame screaming at him,and burnt areas drawing just as much attention to themselves.

"Look at that,Lugnut."Blitzwing said calmly."The Autobot looks burnt."His head swirled to reveal angry again."Let me help with that!"

Prowl felt himself begining to freeze. Slowly,starting at his one pede.

"Blitzing!"a familiar voice shouted.

The ice came out faster,getting him almost to his waist. Optimus was running toward the 'Cons, his battle axe in hand.

"Hurry!"Lugnut said.

"I'm trying!"Blitzing said,continuing to coat Prowl.

It was almost up to his face now. He had no time to close his optics as a final blast from the ice cannon hit him.

"Go,go go!"Blitzing shouted,taking to the skies.

Lugnut lept up and transformed,taking off as well. Bumblebee and Optimus were shooting at the two Decepticons,who were now too far to hit. Ratchet and Bulkhead were with them too.

"What's that?"Bumblebee asked,pointing at a black and gold glint under a tree.

Ratchet went over,and lifted up the pede.

"Eww!"Bulkhead and Bumblebee exclaimed.

"Where's Prowl?"Optimus asked,looking a bit sick himself at the sight of the leg.

"Over here!"Bumblebee shouted."Of spark!"

"What is it little-"Bulkhead started,and stopped.

Ratchet pushed by both of them. Optimus stood beside the younglings,shocked. Prowl was frozen in a block of ice,missing his right pede,his right servo 'hanging' from his frame. It would have been on the ground if the ice had not frozen the last tube connecting it to his frame. His right hand was beyond recognition. He was also covered in burns and melted sections.

"Bulkhead!"Ratchet shouted."Get your aft over here."

"Wha-what can I do?"Bulkhead asked nervously.

"Get out your wrecking balls and bang this ice!"Ratchet said.

"What do you think happened?"Bumblebee asked.

Optimus looked around,some trees looked charred,but not on fire. The grass was also rather burnt in a path. He followed it for about fifty feet until he cane to a 'clearing',or where the burns formed a circle.

"Lugnut's explosives."Prime said,turning to the yellow youngling who had followed him.

"Prime!"Ratchet shouted.

Optimus and Bumblebee ran back to the was nearly free of the ice. There was still a small sheet completely surrounding him.

"Gently."Ratchet said.

Bulkhead tapped the ice. A small crack appeared,and for a moment everything was very still. Then the crack suddenly enlarged it's self,and shattered into thousands of pieces. Prowl let out a small moan as his frozen optics became releaved of ice and closed. He fell foward,and Ratchet and Optimus caught him before his oil splattered frame could hit the ground.

"We have to get him back to base."Ratchet said.

"Autobots,transform!"Optimus said.

The capable Autobots did so as Prowl remained uncontious on the ground. Ratchet opened up his back and his force shield wrapped around Prowl and lifted him in. The Autobots speed through the streets,ever siren available blarring. They reached th ebase in record time. Sari was standing by the entrance,waiting for them.

"Did you get Prowl?"she asked as most of them transformed.

Ratchet sped right by her and enterd the med-bay in alt. mode. He reopened his back,and put Prowl on the table usuing his force fiels. He then transformed and had Prowl instantly on an I.V and moniters. He was trying to reatach the pede.

"Let me help."Sari said,trying to climb onto the table. Bumblebee gave her a boost.

She went over to Prowl.

"Deja vous."she said as she inserted her key into his port.

It glowed and the pede reattached itself,his hand and servo were fixed,and every burn and melt mark on his frame dissapeard. Prowl's face,which had been tense from the pain,became relieved. Prowl moaned slightly as he opend his optics slowly.

"Prowl?"Ratchet asked.

"Yes?"Prowl answerd.

He breathed a sigh of relief. As much as he hated to admit it,that key was Spark sent.

"This is what,the second time Sari's had to use her key on you?"Bumblebee asked.

Prowl looked hurt at that remark,and hung his head."I-I didn't mean to be a bother."

"It's not your fault."Optimus said.

"It is. If I hadn't been a stubborn fool I wouldn't have been in the forest."Prowl said.

Optimus couldn't argue with that.

"Go get some oil and go to bed early."Ratchet said,shoving Prowl out of the med-bay.

Prowl didn't argue,and headed towards his berth room. He took a can of oil on his way there,and sat down at the desk to drink it. It had no flavor. He pushed it aside,holding his helm in his hands.

Everything felt like it was too much. The fighting, the battles, the pressures of war, it was all too much! He wished there was something he could do to forget about the war,about everything,if only for five cycles. Then he sat up. There was something. What had started this whole mess? What had made him go to the forest in the first place?

Prowl went to the drawer and unlocked it. He pulled out a large,brown bottle of oil beer. He looked it over before picking up a bottle of High Grade energon. He placed the energon back and opened up the oil beer. He glanced at the clock quickly. It was getting late. Sari was being taken home,Bulkhead was probably watching some program on the television,and Ratchet and Optimus were probably doing their own thing.

"Just one sip."he told himself.

With one quick motion Prowl took one sip of that oil beer. It was just as he remembered it. It's strong flavor instantly made him feel better. He took another sip,and then another. His 'one sip' soon turned into one bottle. Being a small mech,he usually energized faster on less. He was quite buzzed as he put the bottle on the desk,empty. H opened the drawer and took out another. He popped it open and soon had it drained as well. Around the middle of his third,he was beyond overenergized. Everything seemed funny. The fact that he was drinking,alone,had nearly offlined was hilarious,and he burst out laughing.

"Prowl?"

He spun around to see a confused yellow bot standing there.

"What's so funny?"Bumblebee asked.

"Nothing."Prowl growled,angry at being caught. He staggered to his pedes as Bumblebee came closer.

"Prowl,are you okay?"Bumblebee asked.

"Get out of here."Prowl hissed.

"Prowl,I-"

"I said get out!"Prowl shouted. He swung at Bumblebee,striking him in the face plates,hard.

Bumblebee fell back with a cry of surprise. He sat on the floor,cradling his cheek,starring at Prowl. He was confused and now scared. Why had Prowl hit him? He was only trying to help. Tears stung his optics as he jumped up.

"Then be that way!"he shouted back.

He turned and ran away,tears streaming down his face. He wasn;t looking where he was going,and ran into Optimus' stomach plating as he ran through the hall.

"Bumblebee,what's going on?"Optimus aske.d."I heard shouting and-"He stopped,looking at the youngling with tears streamingdown his face plates."What's the matter."

"Prowl's a jerk is what's the matter!"he said,his voice hitching as he tried to stop crying. He quickly turned his face to the side,removing his hand as an attempt to hide his face.

"Bumblebee,look at me."Optimus said, not in a demanding tone,but one of concern and worry.

Bumblebee made no movement.

"Bee."Optimus said softly.

Bumblebee put his hand on his face and then looked at Optimus. The Prime sighed and knelt before the youngling. He gently removed the hand. There was a large dent,and a small trickle of oil.

"Did Prowl do this to you?"Optimus asked.

Bumblebee said nothing.

"Bumblebee,I need to know."Optimus said firmly,yet gently."Did Prowl do this to you."

"Yes."Bumblebee said,his voice barely making any noise.

Optimus stood up. He took Bumblebee's hand and led him into the main hangar.

"Ratchet,is this serious?"Optimus asked.

Ratchet came over."How did you manage to do that?"he asked."It's not serious,but it needs to be taken care of. How did it happen."

"Can you take care of it and then meet me at Prowl's room?"Optimus asked.

"Prowl did this?"Ratchet asked,shocked.

Optimus nodded once and then headed towards Prowl's berthroom.

"Come on,Bee."Ratchet said."Let's get you fixed up,"

"All right."Bumblebee sniffed.

"Hey,little buddy."Bulkhead said,having watched when Optimus walked in."When you're all pacthed up,maybe we can watch a movie."

"Would you like that?"Ratchet asked.

Bumblebee shrugged and sniffed once,usuing his free servo to wipe his face."I guess."he said.

Ratchet nodded. He sighed,inwardly cursing the cyber-ninja out.


	5. Chapter 5 Disgust

Chapter 5 Disgust

_Just sneak in,take the credits,and leave. That's all he needed to do. It was simple. The target was a small dojo on Cybertron. The thief,a now sixteen,by human years, year old Prowl. Ever since he had found out what was in that injection,everything had been downhill from there. He was a raging alcaholic by the time he was 'ten',and was completely dependant on polychromine. He usually found himself passed out in a gutter,and was always stealing._

_"Not stealing,borrowing with no intentions of returning."Prowl said quietly to himslef as he swung in through an open window._

_He opened a drawer in a closed room,and found just what he was looking for. There wern't many credits there,but enough. He had to get some more booze. He needed more needles! He turned to leave,but stopped. The room was filled with data-pads. Oh how he loved to read! That is,when he wasn't high or drunk,or having a panic attack from the lack of drugs,or had a processor ache from a hangover. Maybe,maybe he would take just one. He pulled one down and turned it on. It was about the history of great cyber-ninjas. He subspaced the credits and the data pad and turned to leave. Suddenly,to his horror,the door opened up._

_"Hey,you!"the mech shouted,angry._

_Prowl lept from the window,and fell the two stories. He had climbed up the vines,but now he just had to hope he didn't kill himslef when he landed. As he landed,he felt his pede snap a bit._

_"Ah!"he grunted as he jumped up and ran as fast as he could._

_"Come back here!"the mech shouted,chasing him._

_The red mech jumped and pinned him down._

_"Let me go!"Prowl shouted,kicking and struggling._

_"Not on your life."the mech said,grabbing Prowl by the servo and dragging him back to the dojo._

_Before he took Prowl inside,he stopped._

_"Give me what you took."he said._

_"I don't know what you're-"_

_"Now,Prowl."he said."Yeah,I know your designation. Most bots do. Prowl,the troublemaker. Prowl,the bot who won't fight. Prowl,the wanted mech,with a pretty handsome reward."_

_"Please,don't turn me in."Prowl pleaded,near tears._

_"I'll let Sensei Yokitron figure out what to do with you. You took his things."the mech continued._

_"Here."Prowl said angerly,subspacing the credits and data-pad. He thrust them in the red mechs hand._

_Then the red mech dragged him inside. A white and blue mech was there. He looked very wise and aged,yet sad. He looked at Prowl with pity. He adressed the red mech as 'Ironhide'. Prowl was trying to listen to the conversation,but found it hard as he hadn't taken any polychromine in awhile,and needed it desperatly._

_"He refuses to fight."Ironhide said._

_"It's not my war!"Prowl snapped,before zoning out again._

_Suddenly,the red mech let go of him,roughly,and then left. He wanted to leave. Yokitron was talking to him again,and he said something back. He wasn't sure what he was saying,but he knew it was very disrespectful._

_"-Then you can go freely."Prowl was able to pick out._

_Prowl glanced smugly at the door._

_"See ya'!"he said as he darted to it._

_He hit a blurr of blue and white and fell back. He knew that there was no chance of escaping now._

That's how he felt as he crashed onto his berth. No escape. Even the High Grade hadn't helped. He sighed heavily,still very overcharged. The door opened up.

"What do you think you wre doing? Striking Bumblebee?"Ratchet exclaimed.

Prowl put a servo in the air and drunkenly tried to waive him off.

"I...told'em to ..ge-leave."Prowl slurred.

"Prowl get up."Optimus said.

"Eh."Prowl mumbled,flipping onto his side,

Optimus grabbed him and sat him up. Prowl sighed,breathing on the Prime's face. Optimus turned his face away.

"Prowl,were you...drinking?"Optimus asked.

"Prime."Ratchet said.

He held three empty bottles in his hands,and a half of a fourth.

"Prowl. I am ashamed of you."Optimus said sternly."No. I am disgusted."

"Whatever."Prowl grumbled.

"Prowl!"Ratchet exclaimed sharply.

He had been searching the room,and was near the tree. He had found more empty bottles.

"Where did you get High Grade energon?"Ratchet asked.

Prowl shrugged and chuckled. He began to laugh.

Ratchet shook his helm."He's drunk. There's no getting through to him. At least tonight anyways."

Prowl began to sway his helm back and forth,and hum a Cybertronian lullaby.

"What is he doing?"Prime asked as Prowl lay his head on Optimus' shoulder.

"I never had a car-rier."Prowl slurred."Or a shire."

"A sire?"Ratchet asked.

"Didn't have one of them either!"Prowl laughed,but it sounded more like a cry.

"Hey,Prime."Ratchet whispered."Since he's in this state,we could use it to our advantage. Ask him some questions,find out about his past."

Optimus didn't like the sound of it,but nodded."So,you didn't have any creators? Then how were you born?"

"I musta had them,and then the dumped me."Prowl mumbled.

"At an orphanage or youth center?"Ratchet asked.

"An alley."Prowl laughed.

Optimus and Ratchet shared a glance at that. They now understood why Prowl didn't like to talk about his younglinghood,or past. They felt sort of ashamed about asking him in such a state,but the needed answers.

"Did someone take care of you?"Optimus asked.

Prowl chuckled."Yep. Me,myshelf,and I-self!"

Ratchet shook his helm. Prowl was getting almost ever word he said wrong,and then making some up in his drunken state.

"You never had any help?"Optimus pressed.

"Well..."Prowl started,his laughter dieing away."Kinda sorta once."

"Who?"Ratchet asked.

Prowl balled his hands into fists and tensed up. He growled once. He looked like he was going to hit something,or someone. Optimus stood up from his spot on the berth,just in case.

"A coupla no good for nothin' bots."Prowl seethed."Got me started."

"Started?"Ratchet asked."On what."

"None of yer business."Prowl said,jumping up."I suggest you leave. Now."

"Prowl,Ratchet and I are only trying to help you."Optimus said.

"As was Bumblebee."Ratchet added.

"I don't need help."Prowl growled."From anyone."

With that,he lept up into the tree,and remained motionless.

"Prowl,could you come down here?"Optimus asked.

"Get your aft down here,Prowl."Ratchet ordered.

There wasn't a single sound from the tree. They both knew he was up there,but decided that they had pushed him enough. This discussion was far from over,and Prowl was going to be lectured something fierce when he sobered up. Right now though,they had to leave him alone.

"Let's go."Ratchet sighed.

Optimus nodded. They two mechs left. They headed out to the main hangar,where Bulkhead and Bumblebee had been watching a movie. Bulkhead was still awake,but Bumblebee had fallen into recharge. It looked like he had cried himself there too.


	6. Chapter 6 Regret,Remorse,and Remembrance

Chapter 5 Regret,Remorse,and Remembrance

Prowl woke up the next morning,his helm pounding and his tank churrning. He moaned softly as he got up. He looked at the clock and had found out that he ahd overslept.

"Slag."he cursed as he went into the main hangar. "What happened last night?"he asked himself.

"That's what I'd like to know."Ratchet said.

Prowl turned and looked at the medic."What do you mean?"

"Do these look familiar?"Optimus asked.

"Or these?"Ratchet added.

Both proceeded to lay down big, brown bottles. Four bottles of oil beer,and four bottles or High Grade energon. A fifth High Grade was half gone,as was a fifth bottle of oil beer.

"Wha-"Prowl couldn't finish. He was shocked,horrified. He sank into a chair."I was only going to have a sip."

"Does this look like a sip to you?"Ratchet asked,motioning to the table filled with bottles.

Prowl shook his helm and sighed."I-I...There's no excuse for this."

"You're right about that."Optimus said."What were you thinking?"

"Besides about everything I didn't want to?"Prowl asked. "I did it to stop thinking. I did it-"Prowl stopped again,finding no words.

"Prowl,if you need to talk-"

"I don't need to talk."Prowl said angerly.

"But we need to talk to you."Ratchet said."What made you do that to Bumblebee?"

"Do what?"Prowl asked,confused.

"Bumblebee,I know you're listening."Optimus said to the empty hall."Can you come here."

Bumblebee came,slightly embarrassed about being caught,but more upset at Prowl.

"This."he said simply,pointing at his face.

The dent was barely noticable now,and a abndage covered the cut.

"I-I did that?"Prowl asked,shocked."Why?"

"That's what we'd like to know."Ratchet said.

Prowl shook his helm,back and forth. He leaned foward holding it,still shaking it to and fro.

"You can go,Bumblebee."Optimus said.

"And don't be listenin' in."Ratchet said grufly.

Bumblebee nodded and left,closing his berthroom door.

"I'm sorry."Prowl said,his voice trembling slightly.

"We're not the ones you should be apologizing to."Optimus said.

Prowl rubbed his pounding head with one hand,trying to sort things out.

"How long have you been drinking?"Ratchet asked.

"I've been sober for stellar cycles."Prowl said."This was the first time in a long time."

"You've struggled before?"Optimus asked.

"Before Yokitron."Prowl said,trying not to give too much away.

"But you were still a youngling when you went to Yokitron."Optimus said.

Prowl nodded.

"How did you get alcahol?"Ratchet asked.

"That is none of your business."Prowl said,standing up.

"Where do you think you're goin'?"Ratchet asked.

"To apologize to Bumblebee."Prowl said.

Optimus nodded and Prowl left. He went to Bumblebee's berthroom door,only to find it locked. He knocked a few times.

"Go away."the younglings voice called out,angry and upset.

"I need to talk to you."Prowl said.

"No."

"Bee,I-I'm sorry."Prowl said,hanging his head."I-I don't know why I hit you. It was wrong of me,and I had no right to do it. I don't ask you to forgive me."

"Good, 'cause I don't."Bumblebee said.

Prowl rested his helm on the cold metal of the door.

"I-I understand that. Bee,I-"Prowl lost his words again,and hit the door once."I-'Im just sorry."

He turned and went into his berthroom. Bumblebee was laying on his berth,crying again. Prowl threw open the drawer he had locked and took out a needle. WIthout hesitation he thrust it into his servomand pushed it's serum in.

"I don't deserve forgiveness."Prowl growled at himself.

He had a plan. He didn' deserve forgiveness,so in his mind he didn't deserve to live. Polychromine,if taken for awhile has disastarous effects on a bots frame,and will offline him,slowly and painfully. If a bot tries to go 'cold turkey',it will ofline him painfully and quickly. That's what he planned to do. Take as much of it as he had,and then stop,resulting in him offlined.

"I won't hurt you again,Bee."he whispered,injecting the last bit of that needle in. He couldn't take it all at once,so he would have to do it slowly.

There were only four needles,so four injections. He had used one,and disposed of it. Only three more to go.

Suddenly,an alarm at base went off.

"Decepticons."Optimus called out.

Prowl jumped up and rushed from his berthroom. He came out at the same time as Bumblebee. Bumblebee stopped and glared at him. Prowl sighed and stopped as Bumblebee passed him.

"I really am sorry."Prowl said.

"Save it."Bumblebee huffed.

"No time,you two."Optimus said."The Decepticons are attacking Sumdac Tower."

"Sari's there!"Bumblebee exclaimed,quickly transforming.

Prowl transformed as well.

"Autobots,roll out!"Optimus commanded.

They all followed and soon reached the tower. It was simply a few Starscream clones.

"Come on."the femme clone said.

"I can't get past the force shield."the suck up clone replied."It was so briliantly placed here-"

"Oh,shut up."she snapped.

"I don't want to be here."another clone said."I don't want to get hurt! I want to go back home."

"Stop it,you wuss!"she yelled at him.

The Autobots began to fire on them.

"Great."Slipstream said,annoyed.

Prowl went up against one,and the others took on others.

"We wern't trying to get into Sumdac Tower."another clone said.

Prowl was glad as he watched the last clone fly away as Slipstream called it quits.

"That was easy."Bulkhead announed,putting his wrecking balls away.

"Bumblebee!"Sari called out,and attaching herslf to his pede.

"Hey,it's okay."the yellow mech said."We scared them off."

"I know!"Sari exclaimed."And it was so cool!"

Prowl sighed as he walked away from them. He was begining to feel shakey. He needed to get the polychromine.

"Um,Optimus?"Prowl asked.

"Is something the matter,Prowl?"the red and blue mech asked.

"No,sir."Prowl answered."If there is nothing needed here,would it be all right if I returned to base?"

"Of course."Optimus said,not really paying attention.

Prowl gave a quick nod before transforming and driving away. He felt he couldn't get to base fast enough. At last he went into robot mode and stumbled to his room. He opend up his drawer and pulled out a needle.

"I-I can't."he told himself.

'Are you a coward,Prowl?' the little voice asked him.

"No."Prowl said.

'It's for Bumblebee. Think how happy he'll be when you're not there to hurt him anymore.'

"It's for Bumblebee."Prowl repeated,and quickly injected himself.

He looked in the drawer. There were two needles left. He he took them all at once,he knew it would have the same effect as if he took them slowly. It would end in a slow,painful offlining.

'Do it.'the little voice said.'For Bumblebee'

Prowl grabbed the other needles and took off their caps.

_Prowl had been at the dojo with Sensei Yokitron for a week or so now. Sensei was rather nice. He actually seemed to...to care. The kind of caring that didn't expect something in return. The kind of caring that had no strings attached. The kind that didn't ask for credits,or upgrades,or even caring in return._

_That's why he felt bad doing it. Prowl felt bad taking the needles and liquor and hiding them. But he had worked hard for those credits. Good,honest work. Sensei Yokitron didn't need to know about the drugs and booze,did he? He was only hurting himself,and who cared about that? _

_Prowl was laying in the berthroom Yokitron had given to him. He thought over the day. Sneaking to Lockdown and those other bots he had met so long ago. He gave them the credits he had worked for,and they in return gave him needles of polychromine and bottles of alcahol._

_It was dark now,late. Sensei should be in recharge. Perfect time to take the polychromine. Prowl stood up from his mat on the floor,and made his way to a opened it up,and withdrew a needle. He jabbed it into his servo and slowly began to inject it. He closed his optics,savoring the feeling. _

_If his optics had been open,he would have seen the door slide open. If his optics had been open,he would have seen the light streaming in,illuminating the armor of a white and blue mech. He would have seen Sensei Yokitron there,looking melanchly and pitying the black and gold mech. _

_Prowl didn't though,and sighed contentedly._

_"Prowl."_

_He jumped up and spun around. His face showing that he was ashamed,but couldn't help it._

_"Prowl,what are you doing?"Sensei Yokitron asked calmly._

_"It's not what it looks like."Prowl said._

_"Prowl,what are you doing?"he repeated,just as calm._

_"Sensei,I-I"Prowl stuttered._

_"Prowl,what have you done?"Yokitron asked,pointing as Prowl's fingers slid the rest of the needle into his servo. "Let me help you."_

_"I don't need help!"Prowl shouted."Especially from an old mech like you!"_

_He through the empty needle in the Sensei's direction. It hit the floor and slid to the blue and white feet. Yokitron closed his optics,turning his helm away. A single tear fell and landed on top of the vial. He looked up at Prowl. He calmly walked over to the drawer,which was very deep. He opend it up and reached inside._

Prowl closed his optics as he injected the last needle into his system. He let the needle sit there, empty. He made no motion to remove it as he sighed contentedly and leaned back in the chair.

"Prowl."a voice from the doorway made the cyber-ninja jump slightly,jarring the needle."What are you doing?"

"Ratchet,It's not what it looks like."Prowl said.

"Prowl,what have you done?"Ratchet asked,putting emphasis on each word.

Prowl sat in his chair,needle still in arm. Two others lay on the floor,empty.

"I-I..."Prowl stuttered.

"You need help."Ratchet said.

"I don't need help!"Prowl exclaimed.

He ripped the needle from him,as it was empty,and threw it at Ratchet. It landed somewhere between them and rolled to the medic's feet. Ratchet looked at Prowl sadly.

"Why,Prowl?"Ratchet asked.

"Because it's for the best."Prowl said,sinking back into the chair.


	7. Chapter 7 Withdrawal

Chapter 7 Withdrawal

_"Prowl."Sensei Yokitron said,leading the black mech into the kitchen._

_"Yes,Sensei?"Prowl asked,hanging his head._

_Sensei Yokitron still held the full bottles and needles in his servos. He set them on the countor,next to a sink system._

_"Prowl,pick up the bottle."_

_Prowl picked up the bottle._

_"Open it,Prowl."Sensei said._

_Prowl did so,and laid the cap on the counter._

_"Prowl,empty the bottle."Sensei said,motioning toward sthe sink._

_"Please."Prowl pleaded._

_"Prowl."Yokitron said gently,laying a hand on his shoulder._

_Prowl sighed,and dumped out the bottle,and then laid it aside,empty. Yokitron nodded his approval,a sad smile flitting across his face for a second._

_"Now the next."_

_Prowl took the next bottle and hesitantly emptied it. Soon,all of the bottles stood in a neat row,completely empty._

_"Very good,Prowl."Sensei said._

_Prowl didn't say anything. The youngling was close to tears. _

_"Now the needles."_

_" ."Prowl said."I need those. Please. I can't live without them."_

_"Prowl,I know that it will be hard. Very hard. But you must do it. I promice you that you will not die."_

_"B-but how can you promice that?"Prowl asked._

_Sensei Yokitron took Prowl's face in his hand,and pointed it towards his own face._

_"I promice you that you will be fine. Nothing bad will happen to you."Yokitron said."Now,break these needles."_

_"Y-yes,Sensei."Prowl said._

_A hammer was handed to Prowl. The needle was lain on the counter. Prowl held the hammer over it,ready to strike. He took a deep breath and raised the hammer,and brought it down. It barely tapped the vial,and the needle went unscathed. The hammer slid to the side as Prowl burried his face on the table._

_"I-I can't."Prowl sobbed,tears flowing freely down his face._

_"Prowl,look at me."_

_Prowl turned to face the blue and white mech._

_"Prowl,dispose of just this needle,and I will get rid of the rest."Yokitron said._

_"I-I can't,Sensei!"Prowl cried._

_Yokitrn sighed._

_"Prowl,listen to me."he said."You have a choice that only you can make. You can either choose to take control of your life,or you can continue down the path you are on. You can let these,"he picked up another needle",control you. The choice is yours,Prowl."_

_He then turned to leave. Before he could completely leave,a sound behind him made him stop dead in his tracks,and a small smile appear on his face. The shattering of glass. The next sound he wasn't expecting. I heavy thud. He turned around to see that the vial was in fact broken,but the hammer had fallen to the floor,and Prowl was clutching the counter for dear life. Sensei Yokitron quickly went over to him and grabbed him as he started to fall._

_"You have made the right choice."Yokitron said as he led the limp mech towards his berthroom._

_"T-thank you,S-sensei."Prowl gasped._

"For the best?"Ratchet asked."How is this for the best?"

Prowl staggered from the chair,and gripped the desk to keep from falling."I-I wouldn't hurt anybody anymore."

Ratchet came over."You don't hurt us."he said,as gently as he could.

"But-but Bumblebee."Prowl seemed to mumble.

"Bumblebee is fine."Ratchet said."You're not. You need help."

"I-I..."Prowl shook his helm as his pedes buckled.

Ratchet grabbed him and started to lead him to the med-bay. They moved slowly,as Prowl could barely move and ever step was painful.

"I-I'm so sorry."Prowl mumbled,his voice hitching and full of static.

"I'm not angry at you."Ratchet said."I'm angry that you didn't ask for help."

"I d-didn't want to be a-a both-her."

"And you're not one now?"Ratchet asked.

Prowl hung his helm and looked away. Ratchet sighed,realizing his mistake.

"I dodn't mean it like that."Ratchet said."But would it have really been worse to talk to somebot?"

"I-I don't know."Prowl said.

Ratchet sat him on the bed-bay berth."Lay down."

Prowl did so,venting heavily. Prowl knew what was going to happen. He had to go through it before. Withdrawal was no fun.

_Prowl shook on the mat. A pail was next to it,half full of half-processed oil. It had been three days since he had decided to stop the polychromine,and had been through the Pit. He was nowhere near the end either. _

_He had purged on and off those three day. Well,purged the first two days and dry heaved the was constantly shaking,and had frightning hallucinations from time to time. He was overheating badly,so badly his frame felt like it was on fire._

_Sensei Yokitron had been by his side the entire time these last few days. He had tried to feed him a few times,but at last had given up as Prowl couldn't keep anything down. He had helped Prowl by gently speaking to him when he had hallucinations,and had tried to cool him down,with no avail. He hadn't left Prowl once,except for now. Yokitron had become so worried for Prowl,that he had left to get a medic. _

_Prowl now lay alone,frightened,shaking,and hot. He wanted the drug so badly,but didn't want it at the same time. He moaned loudly,wishing that this conflict of processor and frame would just come to an end all ready._

_"I'm back,Prowl."Yokitron's voice came from the door. "This is Torque. He is a medic."_

_A green and white bot came in. He was tall and sender,and had medic symbols on his servos. He sighed as he looked at Prowl before knealing besides him and scanning him._

_"Polychromine you say?"Torque said,adressing Yokitron about a previous conversation._

_Yokitron gave a nod of his helm. He looked tired,and worried. Two things very few bots have ever seen this mech show. He was usually calm,peaceful,wise...but all those things seemed to have vanished._

_The medic sighed as he stood up. "Can we talk somewhere,away from here?"_

_"Of course."Yokitron said."Follow me."_

_Yokitron led the medic towards the entrance,and stopped in the hallway before a door leading outside._

_"What is it that you wish to speak of?"Yokitron asked._

_"I have some things I need to ask ya'."Torque said."It'll help me make a diagnosis."_

_"Of course."Yokitron answered,calmly._

_"How old was he when he started?"Torque asked,launching right into his questions._

_Yokitron told him,and watched as the medic's fase became crestfallen,and his demeanor became sullen._

_"That long?"Torque shook his helm."Then there is nothing I can do."_

_"I...understand."Yokitron said,trying to remain calm for the news he knew was coming._

_"Prowl will offline if he doesn't get any better."Torque said."I'm sorry."_

_Yokitron sighed,and straightened himself."If there is nothing you can do,then you have no reason to apologize. What is your fee,doctor?"_

_Torque shook his helm."No fee."_

_"But,I must give you something for your troubles."Yokitron insisted._

_The medic shook his helm again. He raised a hand in the air."Really,I can't take anything. It wouldn't be right,as I can't do anything."_

_Yokitron nodded."Thank you."_

_The medic opened the door to leave,but stopped._

_"There is one thing i can do for him."he said."Won't do much,but it will help him some."He handed Yokitron some pills."It might bring down his fever."_

_"Thank you."Yokitron repeated._

_"No credits,either."Torque said."If he lives you might get a might not."_

_With that,he closed the door behind him and left. Yokitron returned to Prowl,who had his optics closed tight,and his hands in fists._

_"How much did you hear,Prowl?"Sensei asked,knowing that the black and gold mech had heard._

_"Enough."he replied in a pained voice."I'm going to die."_

_"No you are not."Yokitron said firmly,kneeling next to the mech._

_"B-but the m-medic-"_

_"It does not matter what he said."Yokitron inturrupted."I made a promice that you would not die,and I intend to keep it."_

_"H-how?"Prowl asked."There is n-nothing you can d-do."_

_"You are right."Yokitron said."There is nothing I can do. The whole matter is entirely up to you. You can choose to live,or you can choose to die."_

_"Again with the choices."Prowl mumbled,puting a hand over his optics._

_"Life is full of them."Yokitron said with a smile."Not all of them are life or death,but a few are. This is one of them. What do you choose?"_

_"Life."Prowl said in a strong voice without hesitation._

_The strenght he had summoned to answer seemed to leave him,and his hand slid to the floor with a thud. He sighed as his optics flickered._

_"Prowl."Yokitron said,worried._

_"Don't worry."Prowl said weakly."I-I'm not goin' anywhere."_

_His optics closed and his helm fell to the side,leaving him in stasis._

"Prowl,Prowl!"a gruff voice called out worridly in a world of darkness."Kid,wake up."

"Wha-"

"The second you laid down you passed out."Ratchet said.

"Oh."Prowl said.

A sudden wave of pain hit Prowl,and he bit his glossa to keep from screaming. His fists clenched up,and he squeezed his optics. He grunted in pain.

"Take it easy."Ratchet said.

The pain began to subside,and Prowl relaxed for a moment. Now a new wave hit him. A wave of nausea. He retched and threw a hand over his mouth. He jerked up,nearly falling back. Everthing was distorted,either too close or too far,and was blurry. He felt a hand on his upper back,and something large and bulky in front of him.

"Here,use this."Ratchet said.

Prowl retched again,and purged into the bucket. He didn't think that he would ever stop. At last his tank stopped pushing it's contents out,and Prowl slumped. He felt himself being laid back.

"I-I'm sorry."Prowl said,repeating what he had said earlier.

"Get some rest,Prowl."Ratchet said,dimming the lights and leaving the med-bay.

Prowl heard Optimus and the others asking what was going on. Prowl could hear a shocked gasp before everything went black again


	8. Chapter 8 Forgiving and Telling

Chapter 8 Forgiven and Telling

Prowl woke up some hpurs later. The med-bay was still darkened,but Prowl didn't mind. The light made his processor-ache worse. He moaned slightly as he looked up at the ceiling. He heard a movement,and then the light turned back on. He cried out slightly,and threw his hand over his optics.

"Sorry,kid."Ratchet said,dimming the lights again.

"I-I'ts...all...right."Prowl said,gasping and panting.

"How are you feeling?"Ratchet asked,scanning him.

"Like...I did...the first...time."Prowl managed.

"The first time?"Ratchet asked.

Prowl shook his helm,showing that he didn't wish to talk about it. To the medic anyway. He did want to talk about it.

"Bee."Prowl mumbled.

"Bee? Bumblebee?"Ratchet asked.

Prowl nodded,making fists as he was suddenly racked with pain,but relaxed as it subsided a bit.

"All right,hold on."Ratchet said,opening the door.

Light streamed in,and then dissapeared as the door closed. Ratchet went out to the main hangar,where Optimus,Bulkhead,and Bumblebee had gathered.

"Ratchet."Optimus stated,standing up."How is he?"

Ratchet shrugged one shoulder."As well as can be expected."

"What's wrong?"Bumblebee asked,looking at the white medic.

"He wants to see you."Ratchet said.

"Me?"Bumblebee asked.

Ratchet nodded.

"All right."Bumblebee sighed.

"Just don't excite him."Ratchet said."His systems can't handle it."

"Hey,I didn't make him do drugs."Bumblebee shrugged,getting up.

"Bumblebee."Ratchet said quickly."Sit. Now."

Bumblebee did sat down quickly.

"Do you know why he took the polychromine?"Ratchet asked.

Bumblebee shrugged.

"Because he was upset. He was trying to snuff himself."Ratchet said.

Bumblebee's optics widened,as did Optimus' and Bulkhead's.

"Why?"Bulkhead asked.

"He thought it would make things better. He thought that he had hurt you."Ratchet said,looking at Bee the entire time.

"He did hurt me."Bumblebee siad,pointing at his face.

"Bumblebee,he tried to kill himself because he didn't want to hurt you anymore. He felt like there was nothing else he could do. You wouldn't accept his apology,so he didn't think there was anything else he could do to show you that he cares."Ratchet said.

"Oh."Bumblebee said,lowering his helm and optics."I didn't know."

"Well now you do."Ratchet said,crossing his servos.

"Now you might think differently when you go in there."Optimus added.

Bumblebee nodded."Are you coming too,doc?"

Ratchet shook his helm."He wants you."

Bumblebee nodded and stood up. He went to the med-bay,pausing before the door to take a deep breath. He opened it, light streaming in, and closed it again. He stood still a moment , letting his optics adjust to the darkness.

"Bee?"a weak voice called from the berth.

"Yeah."Bumblebee answered. He went towards the berth."How ya' doin',buddy?"

"I-I'm sorry."Prowl panted.

"You don't have to be."Bumblebe said."I overreacted."

Prowl shook his helm. "I-I'm sorry."he gasped again.

"It's okay."Bumblebee said."Your forgiven."

The look on Prowl's face almost broke Bumblebee's spark. He look,releaved. Like the weight of the world had been lifted from his shoulders,or a great burden taken from him.

"Thank y-you."Prowl said.

Prowl motioned to a chair beside the berth. Bumblebee sat down.

"Is there something you wanted to talk about?"Bumblebee asked.

Prowl gave a slight nod and vented deeply. "B-Bee? H-How old a-are you?"Prowl asked.

Bumblebee looked confused at the question but told him. Prowl vented again.

"I was only a f-few stellar c-cycles youner then you w-when I s-started."Prowl said.

"Started what?"Bumblebee asked.

"Everything."

Prowl shuttered his optics. He had started to tell,and now he must finish. He slowly began to tell Bumblebee everything,starting at the robo-dog. He told him about Vortex, Blackmail , Doublecross, and Lockdown. He told him about how he started on the drugs and alcahol ,and how those bots would give him more in exchange for upgrades and credits.

"T-they simply wanted the p-pay."Prowl said.

"Vortex seemed kinda nice,like she wanted to help you. What happened to her?"Bumblebee asked.

"She's d-dead."Prowl said.

"How?"Bumblebee asked,his shoulders slumping a bit. He had hoped that maybe she had left her brother's business.

"Nob-bot knows."Prowl said,weakening."Most l-likely..."

"Prowl?"

Prowl wasn't moving,and his optics were closed,but Bumblebee knew that he wasn't asleep. To his surprise,Prowl snapped up and leaned over the side of the berth.

"Ohh..."Bumblebee said,his voice drawling as he watched Prowl purge into the bucket.

After a few minutes Prowl stopped and laid back on the berth with a soft,yet pained moan. He closed his optics again,venting.

"Are you all right?"Bumblebee asked.

Prowl barely moved his head to nod."H-her brothers."Prowl said hoarsly.

"What?"Bumblebee looked at Prowl.

"They p-probably killed her."Prowl said,finishing what he had been trying to say before he had become sick.

He tried to continue,but his voice box falled him and began to emit static. He tried again,but with the same outcome. He rubbed his forehelm with his hand.

"You should rest,Prowl."Bumblebee said.

Prowl motioned towards the door,as if to tell the youngling that he could leave if he wanted to. Bumblebee shook his helm.

"It's all right. I'll stay here,if you want."Bumblebee said.

Prowl gave a small nod as his optics began to visor dimmed and he fell into recharge rather quickly. Bumblebee sat in his seat,still and quiet, for once. His processor was racing faster then Blurr though. Everything Prowl had said,talked about,told him. The door opened,a crack of light widening as Ratchet stepped inside.

"You still in here,kid?"he asked.

"Yeah."Bumblebee said."He was talking to me."

"About what?"Ratchet asked,looking over some charts and adding and I.V. to the limp servo.

"About when he was my age."Bumblebee said.

"He did?"Ratchet asked,surprised that Prowl would tell the talkative youngling about that. Especially when he refused to tell him or even Optimus."What did he say?"

"I don't think he'd like it if I said."Bumblebee said after thinking for a moment.

"I guess so."Ratchet replied."You know you can leave."

"I told him I'd stay. I have some questions for him anyways."Bumblebee said.

"Fine,but stay quiet when he's resting,and don't pester him too much."

"I won't."

Ratchet grunted a bit as he left. Prime wasn't going to believe this. Bumblebee not only sitting still,being quiet,listening! Also Prowl talking. Nope,that Optimus Prime wouldn't believe this.


	9. Chapter 9 Clean

Chapter 9 Clean

Prowl was waking up. It had been bleems,but Bumblebee had waited patiently. Well,he had blown up a few of Ratchet's rubber gloves,and maybe drawn on a couple of blank data-pads...but he had been rather patient.

"Prowl,are you up?"Bumblebee asked.

A small nod answered him.

"Are you all right?"

"Okay."was the weak answer."I-I bet you have questions."

Bumblebee nodded."Yeah,for starters, what happened to you?"

Prowl told him about trying to steal from the dojo,and being caught by Ironhide. He told him about how Yokitron had kept him from prison,and even took him in.

"But yet I s-still took the drugs a-and booze."Prowl said."But now with m-my own credits."

Bumblebee nodded."Did you ever get off of them?"

"Yes."Prowl said.

He started to tell about how Sensei Yokitron had found out about what he was doing,about how he always seemed to know. How Yokitron wasn't angry,but how sad and dissapointed he looked. He told about how he had made Prowl dispose of the alcahol and drugs. He even told him about his breakdown. All the while Bumblebee listened,asking a question now and then.

"Y-you almost offlined?"Bumblebee asked in shock.

Prowl nodded. Bumblebee looked at the clock. It was almost mid-night! Thay had talked all evening,and most of the night. Prowl looked exhausted,and Bumblebee looked tired as well.

"Bee,g-go get some rest."Prowl said,his voice box threatening to fail again.

Bumblebee shook his helm."I can sleep right here."

Prowl didn't have the strenght to argue,and now had no voice to argue with. A sighed as his optics closed against his will once again. The next morning Bumblebee woke up rather late. It was to be expected as ha had stayed up half the night. Prowl was still in recharge,and didn't look like he would be out of it anythine soon. Bumblebee's tank grinded.

"I'll just go get a can of oil."Bumblebee told himself.

He stood up and left the med-bay,as quietly as he could. The door sqeaked,making him flinch and freeze. Prowl stayed asleep though,and he left the room. As he entered the main hangar he grabbed a can of oil and started to drink up.

"Hey there,little buddy!"Bulkhead said happily."See your up."

"Yep."Bumblebee said.

"How's Prowl?"Optimus asked the yellow mech as Ratchet headed towards the med-bay.

"He's still in recharge."Bumblebee said.

"That's odd."Bulkhead said.

"Not really."Optimus replied. "What would be odd is if he woke up."

"There's no chance of that happening."Ratchet said,coming out of the med-bay."His sytems are in emergency shut down. The final stage of coming down."

"Coming down?"Bumblebee asked.

"Having the drug leave his systems."Optimus said.

"If he's not gonna wake up, I don't have to sit in there,do I?"Bumblebee asked.

Optimus chuckled."No,not if you don't want to."

"Whew,good."Bumblebee said,breathing a sigh of relief."It's really boring in there!"

Prowl slept nonstop for hours,days even. The polychromine didn't want to leave without a fight. For the three days Prowl slept,his mind went over and over his times as a youngling. He had one last memory yet,before he woke up.

_Sensei Yokitron sat in a corner of the berthroom. Prowl was in recharge. He had been in recharge for almost five days now. Yokitron was relieved that Prowl had reached this final stage so soon. Prowl was fighting this drug harder then he had though possible. _

_Morning was coming. It was a beautiful sunrise. There had been a terrible storm these last three day,two days after Prowl had fallen into this seemingly endless recharge. It had stopped late that night. The thunder had stopped it calling,the lighting refusing to flash. The storm didn't bother Yokitron. He thought it rather humerous that storms didn't happen most places in Cybertron. The main city,Iacon, had never had a storm of anykind in it's entire didn't know what they were missing out on. _

_Yokitron continued to meditate when a soft noise behind him caught his attention. He opened his optics to see Prowl shifting slightly. The younger mech took a deep breath before waking up and letting it out._

_"Prowl?"Yokitron asked as the black and gold bot proceeded to try and sit up on weak servos._

_"Yes,sensei?"_

_"How do you feel this moring?"_

_"Like I have never before."Prowl said,not finding any words to describe it. _

_He struggled to his pedes,with some help from Yokitron. _

_"Prowl,look out the window."Yokitron said gently._

_Prowl looked and was amazed at what he saw. The sun had just risen,casting a young,bright light on everything below. The storm had left everthing wet,which now glistened in the early sunlight.A soft breeze moved anything that it could in gently motions,causing it to shimmer and glisten. It described exactly how Prowl felt. Young,energetic,clean._

_Yokitron smiled as the young mech gazed out at the beauty."Let us get some breakfast,and then we shall greet the day together."_

_"Yes,sensei."Prowl said with a small bow._

Prowl let out a soft moan. Not of pain or worry or strife,but of contentment.

"Prowl?"Ratchet asked as the black and gold mech woke up."How ya' feelin'?"

Prowl thought a moment before answering.

"Clean."


	10. Chapter 10 Free

Chapter 10 Free

Days had past since Prowl had woken up. He had been released with a clean bill of health. He had apologized nermorous times to everybot on base for what he had done,the trouble he had put them through.

"Really,it's all right."Optimus said.

"Just don't do it again. Ever."Ratchet had added.

Prowl gave a nod. Bumblebee was racing up to base,nearling knocking a few of the mechs over.

"Bumbleee!"Ratchet scolded as the yellow mech transformed.

"Sorry."Bumblebee said quickly."We've got mail!"

"Mail?"Optimus asked."We did,or did just one bot?"

"Well..."Bumblebee said,trying to get the letter open,but Ratchet snached it away from him."Hey!"

"It's addressed to...Prowl."Ratchet said,looking at the name on the half-torn letter.

"Me?"Prowl asked.

"Here."Ratchet said.

"It might be best if I...opened it here."Prowl said.

Optimus nodded as Prowl finished what Bumblebee had started. He pulled out the note. How it was bot sized,he couldn't tell. His optics widened as he read.

"Prowl?"Ratchet asked.

Prowl didn't answer him as he continued to read. His optics hardened beneath his visor,giving him an angry appearance.

"Prowl? Is everything all right?"Optimus asked.

Prowl again didn't say anything as he transformed and sped off,leaving the letter to flutter to the ground. Bumblebee picked it up,but Optimus took it from him.

"Hey!"

"Sorry,but it might not be good for a youngling to read."Optimus said. After glancing it over,he read it aloud.

" 'Prowl,

By the time you get this you probably have gotten my package. Hope you enjoyed it.

Now it's time to pay. I've got more of the stuff that you liked so much as a youngling,

but it's going to cost you this time. Bring credits or upgrades,both if you can. I'll be in the

forest,waiting for you.

Lockdown.' " Optimus finished.

"Lockdown?"Ratchet asked.

Bumblebee's optics widened as he remembered what Prowl had told him."He's one of the bot's that got him started!"

"He is?"Bulkhead asked.

"That doesn't matter now,but we have to get Prowl back."Optimus said.

"You don't think he's trying to get more,do ya'?"Ratchet asked.

"I don't know. I doubt it though."Optimus said."Autobots,transform and roll out."

The others did so and followed Optimus out of the base. They were heading to the forest,where Prowl had obvioulsy left to.

Prowl had sped into the forest,never stopping. He sped on,until he found what,or who, he was looking for.

"Lockdown."he said.

"He,Prowl. See ya' came. Ya' bring me what I asked for?"Lockdown said slowly and smugly,leaning against a tree.

"If it's payment,then yes."Prowl said.

He took out two shruiken and threw them at the calm mech. Lockdown was caught off guard,and found his hook pinned to the tree.

"Payback?"Lockdown asked calmly.

"Yes."Prowl said.

"Thought ya' wuld be happy to see that stuff again. Maybe enough so tah come with me."Lockdown said.

"You thought that by getting me addicted to drugs and alcahol again,you could not only get me as a costomer,but leave earth with you?"Prowl asked,angry.

"So ya' did take them."Lockdown smirked.

"Yes,and I regret every moment of it."Prowl said.

"Ya' do know what happens now,don't ya'? Even if ya' are clean,ya' still weakened."Lockdown said.

"What do you mean?"Prowl asked,confused and now worried.

"That ol' sensei of yers got ya' off the first time,and I'm guessin' the bots back at yer base got ya' off this time."Lockdown continued,going at his slow drawl.

"Yes,but what does it matter to you?"Prowl asked.

"It don't matter tah me."Lockdown said."But tah you it's a big deal."

"Why?"Prowl asked,holding another shruiken,ready to through.

"Ya' spark took the blunt of it this time. It's weakened now. How ya' gonna fight 'Cons with a weak spark? Come with me and ya' don't havta fight no more."Lockdown said.

"Still trying to get me to come along with you on that broken down ship?"Prowl asked,throwing the second shruiken. It pinned Lockdown's hook down more.

Lockdown tugged,but stopped with a smirk as he couldn't remove it."How ya' gonna fight,Prowl?"

Prowl didn't answer him as he walked over. He put his hands over the shriken and pulled them out with one swift motion. He turned to leave,wanting nothing to do with that bounty hunter. As he walked,he heard a chuckle and a blaster being powered up. He heard it shoot,and flipped up into the air,landing in a tree.

"Try to shoot me when my back is turned?"Prowl asked.

He had to jump to another branch to avoid more blasts. Prowl pitied the mech Lockdown had taken it from.

"How ya' gonna fight,Prowl?"Lockdown repeated.

Prowl stood up straight on his branch,near the trunk of the tree. He took out his shruiken again,and face Lockdown. He aimed for the bounty hunter,and threw.

"No!"Lockdown cried out as the shruiken hit.

Prowl threw a second shruiken,lodging it in the ship. That's where the first one had landed as wellmcutting off vital utilities to it.

"Mah ship!"Lockdown shouted.

Prowl smirked as he sent out a pulse for the shruiken to return to him. He caught them and replaced them before leaping down from his branch and retreating. Before he had left the view of the ship,Lockdown called out angerly to him.

"Go back. I don't want ya' with me. Ya' still have tah pay the price for what you did. You still is bound up."Lockdown said."Soon you're be back in drugs and alcahol. You'll see."

As he drove back to base,he wasn't at all surprised to see the others rushing towards the forest. They were still a few miles off though. He transformed and met them halfway down the street,where they too transformed.

"Prowl,are you all right?"Optimus asked.

"Why did you take off like that?"Bumblebee asked.

"To finish what I started."Prowl said."We shouldn't see Lockdown for awhile."

"What did you do to him?"Bulkhead asked.

Prowl took a sharp breath before answering."I damaged his ship a bit. The only thing Lockdown cares about other than his upgrades."

He took another sharp breath. It rather hurt to breath.

"Are you all right? Did he injure you?"Ratchet asked,noticing the sharp breaths Prowl was taking.

"I'm fine."Prowl said,rather breathlessly."He did damage me,but not the way you think."

"What do you mean?"Optimus asked.

Prowl became rather dizzy and he swayed a bit on his pedes.

"Sit down."Ratchet said,shoving the mech down.

Prowl leaned foward abit,taking sharp breaths."He was the one who...sent me the box. So in a way...he damaged me."

"Did anything happen during the battle?"Bumblebee asked excitedly.

Prowl took another sharp breath,he put a hand over his pounding spark."Yes."

"What happened?"Optimus asked.

"He asked my...how I would...fight."Prowl panted.

"Why would he ask you that?"Bulkhead asked.

"Because the drugs weakened my spark."Prowl said.

He closed his optics,trying to make the sharp pounding stop. He tried to take a normal breath,but it still came sharp and painful.

Ratchet nodded."I knew that would happen."

"You did?"Prowl asked,breathlessly.

Ratchet nodded again."Yep. This is going to happen every time you fight."

Prowl sighed,able to stop the sharp breaths,and his spark was slowing down."It's the price I pay for my foolishness. The first time it was my optics that payed the price."

"Is that why you wear a visor?"Bumblebee asked.

Prowl gave a quick nod.

"Can it come off?"Bumblebee asked.

"Bumblebee."Optimus scolded.

"It's all right."Prowl said.

He vented before reaching up and touching the side of his helm. The blue visor slid foward on that side slightly. Prowl did the same thing to the other side. He looked down at the ground,and slid the visor off. He held it in one hand as he closed his optics. When he looked up and opened them,he revealed a pair of blue optics. They were both dim and grayish. They turned as he tried to focus on something,anything.

"Can you see anything?"Bulkhead asked.

"Figures."Prowl said simply."And outlines. The visor shows me what I can't see on my own."

With that he slid it back on,but he didn't look up. Nobot said anything for a moment.

"We should return to base."Optimus said at last.

Ratchet and Prowl gave a nod. They all transformed and began to drive back to base. Prowl drove in the rear, most likely not wanting to talk with anyone. He thought of what Lockdown had said, about him returning back to the drugs,and back to the alcahol.

"No."he said."I'm free."

Author's Note: Hi there! Did you like the story? Should there be one more chapter showing how Prowl deals with his new weakend spark during battle,or should there be a whole second book? Please review what you think I should do,even if you're not a member of fanfic!


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